As a tribute to a great lady whose spirit and strength inspired us, here is a letter my sister wrote her as we bade her farewell a few years ago.
Dearest Mama,
A woman of purpose,Of silent strength and quiet
dignity.That’s how we will always remember you.
From my earliest memories as a three year old when you
bade me goodbye because the pursuit of higher learning
beckoned.You crossed the oceans and sailed to Spain to
obtain your doctorate.Indeed,Mama,you were a woman of
purpose and a woman much ahead of your time.
I remember you upon your return,How you stood tall and
elegant in your suit,walked towards me,took my hand
and said “Do you know me? I’m your mother.”
You came home with stories about far away lands,and
that’s how I learned how big the world was,and how
exciting discovery of foreign lands and foreign
cultures could be.
You also came home with a spanish guitar and I will
never forget how,during many twilight afternoons,you
serenaded Victor,Gina and myself with your spanish
songs.
And Mama,I will never forget your strength.Through
life’s twists and turns,you always stood firm.You were
always determined to weather any storm , always
single-minded about providing for your children, if
nothing else,the best possible education and a strong
pride in our families and our heritage.You instilled
these values so deeply,telling us that,even if
everything were stripped bare,we could always stand
with our heads high because we were Hidalgos, and we
were Laurels,two families with illustrious pasts and
great achievements.
I will never forget how when in my teens, and it
seemed more fun to be with friends than the sunday
family reunion at Mandaluyong,You insisted that family
alwyas came first and that if we didn’t learn it early
enough,We’d learn it later,but painfully,in life.
You loved life.You loved a good glass of red wine,good
food,family traditions, and fond memories.You made us
experience those joys in the simplest of ways: like
strolling with me just to smell the pines in Baguio.Or
urging me to swim farther out in the ocean at Lolo
Augusto’s isla,because you said there was nothing to
fear.”Whatever you set your mind to do,you can do.”
In your later years,your thirst for discovery never
ceased ,and you remained a trooper,still urging me to
see more of Europe as we hopped on trains to visit
Italy,Spain, and France. You always pointed to the
simplest of beauties:The azure mediterrenean,the
flowers in a park in France,or the magnificence of
David in Italy.
And when life tossed its greatest challenges at
you,you were a woman of silent strength.You were
strong even during your ultimate test—When your
first born son Victor–was taken away at a tender age
of 21 years. You stood there deeply feeling your
sorrow,But always in silent strength and quiet
dignity.
I also know how you accepted with silent strength,our
years of separation–The result of historical
circumstances none of us could control. But through
all your children’s indiscretions,Mama,you never
failed to say to us: ” I trust you and will always be
proud of you.”
You tried to narrow the distance,however,even with
precious little resources,you went to visit and spend
time with me,Paolo and Niki in New York, Gina and
Matisse in Los Angeles,And I will not forget how much
love you showered them during your last visit.It’s no
wonder that Matisse,upon learning of your passing
away,didn’t cry.He wailed in painful sorrow.But Paolo
cried and said He wanted to make the long journey to
say goodbye to you.He remembers your smile,your
hugs,the way you always wanted to kiss and smell his
hair.Matisse remembers your walks in the parks of Los
Angeles. Niki –who I am so happy I named after
you–Lilia Nicole–remembers how you read stories to
her at bedtime.
Mama,we will miss you very much. We will miss your
paella,embotido,and potato salad.But we found your
well-guarded recipes and we can attempt to make them
again.
But maybe it was time to send you to three other
people who also dearly loved you: Papa,Victor and
Danny. Enjoy your eternal peace and happiness with
them,in a place that is much better than the ground we
all stand on. Papa,Victor and Danny, take Mama into
your embrace and everlasting happiness.
Mama,we will remember all the values you taught us and
will dedicate our lives to raising our children as you
would have wanted–to grow as persons of
purpose,silent strength, and quiet dignity.
We are all here,Mama,to honor your life.I am here for
Gina too–Your eldest daughter–who loved you so
dearly though she could not be here.I am also here for
your beloved sons, Rico and Cholo,Becky, and your
darling Nikka,who all had the honor of easing your
passage from this life to life everlasting.
Farewell Mama.All that we are today we owe you.We will
always honor your memory and legacy.We will always
love you.Guide us,protect us and our children from
above,as you always did thru your 75 years on this earth.
Love,
Amy
Our Mother, Lilia Hidlago Laurel lived fully till she was called home at 75
Amy, my sister followed her after a few years. They are celebrating mom’s birthday as I write this.
I did not think i would win anyway! So That evening I was actually with my partner and my family. We had just visited the family niche in St, James Cathedral in Alabang and spent the afternoon there chatting in front of our beloved departed between silent prayers. In the meantime rume-red carpet na pala ang mga famas nominees! Then, just when my partner and I were about to go home, I recieved a text from the star cinema promo people asking whether I was going to the awards night. I simply said NO. I got a text back which said, " ok po direk, watch na lang po kayo sa channel 4". So, at home, i popped open a bottle of white, got bare to my undies and slouched on the couch while my partner went off to his room to tinker with his PC (thats how he relaxes).
